Art of Conversation

 

Deeply concerning. Many young people today aren’t being taught the art of conversation, or worse, they’re picking up habits rooted in disrespect, sarcasm, or defensiveness—not through intention, but through exposure and imitation. Subways, school hallways, online chatrooms, and even home settings can become echo chambers of broken speech patterns.

Here's what's happening:

• Media Modeling: Reality TV, social media, and even cartoons often reward shouting, clapping back, and verbal dominance rather than respect and inquiry.
• Lack of Guided Practice: Many schools don’t formally teach conversation as a skill—how to disagree respectfully, how to listen without reacting, or how to communicate feelings without shame or aggression.
• Stress and Disconnection: Many kids feel emotionally unseen or overwhelmed. When emotional intelligence isn’t taught, frustration turns into sarcasm, teasing, or disrespect.
• Parent-Child Imitation: If kids see adults talking over one another, yelling, or using power rather than dialogue, they copy that. If adults are too distracted or worn out to model kind speech, kids improvise—with media as their teacher.

What Can Be Done?

A  few powerful ideas we can build into the school curriculum or neighborhood programs:

1. Create a 'Conversation Club' in Schools or Libraries

Let students practice real conversation—not debates, not performances, but soul-to-soul exchanges. Give them themes like:

• “Talk to someone today about what they dream of doing.”
• “Share a time you felt misunderstood and listen in return.”

2. Community Elders and Parents: Host Listening Circles

Bring back the art of storytelling. Let youth hear people speak slowly, reflectively, with purpose. Let them ask questions. Let them learn from rhythm and memory, not just noise.

3. Teach Students to Journal and Reflect

Before reacting with words, they learn to pause, write, and process. This helps build emotional vocabulary and respectful expression.

4. Media Literacy Workshops

Have teens analyze clips from shows they love—and critique them. Ask: “How would this conversation go in real life? What’s missing? How would your grandmother respond to this tone?”

5. Relearn How We Speak at Home

We need spaces where parents and teens rehearse family conversations—without judgment. Youth need to hear:

• “That tone hurt me.”
• “Let’s try that again, but with care.”
• “It’s okay to be mad, but not cruel.”

We are always teaching culture—with every word, every glance, every silence. If we don’t consciously teach healthy, respectful, curious conversation, something else will fill the gap.